Dog Literacy Project Celebrates Its First Graduate

The Dog Literacy Project was founded with one goal: To change the fact that 100% of dogs in the world are illiterate. Or I should say, 100% of dogs WERE illiterate. Thanks to the hard work of our supporters and believers, only 99.999999999999999% of the dogs in the world are illiterate. Approximately.

What does progress look like? Progress looks like a white boxer with a few black spots. What does progress feel like? Progress feels soft and loves to be scratched behind the ears and on the belly. What does Progress smell like? Kibbles & Bits and bacon.

Progress’s name is Kila, the first dog to defy the odds and learn to read. It was not easy for her, but she did it. Kila is now going to become a volunteer writer for Rabble Rouse The World, as a way to give back to the project that helped teach her learn to read.

Is Kila’s better off now that she can read? To find out Donny, a parrot from Rabble Rouse The World’s Parroting School, sat down with Kila for an exclusive interview about how reading has changed her life.


Donny: You were quoted a few years ago saying “Woof, woof, woof, woof, woof, woof.” Do you still feel that way?


Kila: You know, I was young when I said that. I’m not the same dog today as I was during my dark years. Before I learned to read, it was hard for me to express how I felt. What I really wanted to say was, “Oh bacon, how I love you so. Oh bacon, even burnt you taste like bite-sized heaven. Oh bacon, if they allowed it, I would marry you and together we would make sweet, crisp, bacon babies.”


Donny: What kind of things do you write about?

Kila: Mostly bacon. Almost entirely bacon. Actually, I think that bacon is the only thing I have written about.

Donny: Being the only literate dog on the planet, do you sometimes feel isolated from other dogs?

Kila: In a way I do, but I also feel closer to humans. And let’s face it, humans are the ones who are buying me the kibbles and bits and when they are feeling really nice giving me a strip of bacon. Most dogs I know don’t even share their bones with me. They’re uncivilized, and aside from our mutual interest in sniffing each other, we just don’t have a lot in common.
Since becoming literate, Kila has written in a variety of genres on mostly one topic (bacon). Below is a poem she wrote on bacon.


Ode to Bacon

Your crispy ways and greasy smile
You are worth every while
Be it morning or noon or night
You will always make life bright
I’ll be honest,  I’ll be true
There are other foods I do
But when it comes to you
Nothing compares
Ham, I love, but would share
Steak I like, but do not care
As much as I care about you
You are my bacon
The one meat I’ll always do

Luke Maguire Armstrong

Luke Maguire Armstrong

Oh Luke Maguire Armstrong knows the Muffin Man. Oh yes, he knows the Muffin man. Luke is an author/musician, raccoon survivor, who has done educational development work in Central America, The Bronx, and Kenya. His work to battle infant malnutrition was featured on ABC News 20/20. He has never fought a bear and is the author of four books, including "How We Are Human" and "iPoems for the Dolphins to Click Home About." Read his bullshit at or follow him @LukeSpartacus and he will sing you songs. 


  • Patti Maguire Armstrong

    That is hilarious but also very informative. It has inspired me to try and teach our two dogs to read. Then, maybe written commands would accomplish what spoken commands have not. If they could read–do I dare hope?–I could write them notes saying: Buddy, Diego, if you don’t stop barking at every outside noise, well….just use your imagination of what could become of you. Or, Buddy, Diego, anything on a plate is NOT yours. If it hits the ground–then okay–otherwise, leave our food on plates alone.

    I’m just wondering if you used the sight method or phonics?

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